FIVE THINGS I LEARNED ABOUT AMERICA

ONE. the public restrooms are terrifying (please be aware that there is actual sarcasm dripping from my fingertips as I write this). I used to have nightmarish dreams about public restrooms, where the doors were small and had huge gaps down the sides, bottom + top. then I went to america...and they became a reality. I waltzed into one the day after I arrived in california, naive + ignorant. and I came out, scarred for life with my british heritage screaming something about privacy and the lack of therein.

TWO. going out for breakfast/lunch/dinner is way more popular! in england + new zealand, going out for food isn't uncommon necessarily, but it's not something you do everyday. whereas, in america, going out for food everyday isn't uncommon at all. we stayed with some murican friends for a while when we were in cali, and we went out for meals everyday and it was flippin awesome, coz hello chick-fil-a and claim jumper. if I moved to america, I would get vurrrrrry fat, because I haven't tried chipotle yet and I know that once I do? there'll be no going back.

THREE. driving for hooours on end is also something that is really normal! in england, we would drive for forty-five minutes, have twenty stops in between, question why we decided to go at all and complain about the mileage (and fuel. and tires wearing down. and the traffic.), but in america, they drive for five hours+ and don't even bat an eye! I realise that I probably suffer from tiny island syndrome, but when I hear people say they're going to drive nine hours to get to a place and then the next day drive back? my briwi brain practically explodes. but for obvious reasons, I think we can safely say that americans are the best travellers. ain't no distance gonna scare no murican. 

FOUR. picking up on the kiwi accent isn't their...er...strongest asset. I went to numerous coffee shops, all of which took my name to write on the cup and during the whole time, only two people got my name right (see above for evidence. well done, random starbucks dude.). I was jane, jiss, janes, janet, joss, and then the real epic fail, john. coz jess sounds a LOT like john, right? the plus side was that everyone said they loved my accent, but I guess they just couldn't understand it (which isn't altogether a shame, because I talk a lot of rubbish anyway)! and I do remember being asked quite a few times if I was australian (not a good thing to say to a kiwi, for future reference) and also a south african (say whaaaaat?).

FIVE. friendly, friendly, friendly! compared to england (where people won't look you in the eye for fear they'll have to smile at you), america is full of "hi, how are you?"s and smiles and "good morning!"s and "so nice to meet you!"s. they're altogether a lot cheerier + more pleasant + when you tell them you're from england, you've sealed the deal (I got asked quite a few times if I knew the queen). sidenote: they also like to have bare feet in the house, which is ultimately very disturbing, because feet should live in socks or shoes (can I get an amen from at least one person?).

have you ever been to america? or maybe you're american? tell me what you think of my points or if you have any of your own, then shout them out in the comments below! 

love you all.
jess
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